How to make your subordinates always want you as their boss?

You may have worked with many bosses, and you may have liked a few of them and hated many of them.
How can you ensure that your subordinates will go all the way for you and want always to work for you as long as possible and even worry that you will leave them someday?
Here are a few tips:

• Show absolute concern for each one of them. You may have a large team, but you will have to set up mechanisms to dialogue with them occasionally.
• Demonstrate and demand full commitment for goals and deadlines.
• Listen carefully in meetings and encourage people to disagree with you.
• Allow team members to disagree with each other, allow the lone voice to be heard and always side with the team member who has a sounder point of view.
• Yield to a sounder view point from your colleagues and demonstrate openness by changing your own point of view.
• Engage actively to solve their problems.
• Critique attacking their behaviour and not them.
• Always be just and fair.
• Even if the whole world is against them, you take their side as long as they are right and the whole world is wrong.
• You should stand against them when they are wrong even though the whole world supports them.

These are some sure fire tips that will endear you to your subordinates forever.
You will be remembered for a long time to come and you may also enter the folklore of the organization as a hero.
Your organization and your teams need such a hero. Will you be one of them?

What to do when we feel low?

We live in a crazy world, in outrageous times, with change happening at warp speed. Some of these changes in our personal lives we welcome with a smile, but there are others that will beat us down and make us frown or even cry.

For many of us the latter variety of changes comes more often than the ones that will cheer us up. What do we do when we get beaten down?

Here are a few tips we can apply immediately to lift our moods:

• We must remember that every trouble has a beginning, middle and an end. It has begun and it will end.
• We should not magnify our troubles by our imagination.
  
• We should cut the recurring cycle of worry and focus on taking steps to solve the problem.
  
• We can choose to involve ourselves with our hobbies and pastimes and use them as a break while we attempt to solve our problems.
  
• We can listen to uplifting music.
  
• We can mingle with people we love, just be with them and be grateful that they are with us.
  
• We can choose to share our woes with a person who will be empathic with us.
  
• We can remember all the struggles which we went through and came clean, well, and successful.
  
• We can use pleasant memory as a weapon to ward off negative thoughts.
  
• We can choose to become bigger than our troubles.
  
• We can pray deeply for guidance and resolution of the problem.
  

We can do all these things while we are actively engaged in solving our problems by taking every step to the resolution of the problem.

We should remember that we have a choice to change our feelings while we attempt to solve our problems because when the dark clouds of our moods lift, we will be able to spot several stars of solutions shining forth. We can hook ourselves to one of the promising stars and sail through the turbulent waters we are in.

Do you learn from your children?

There comes a time in every parent’s life when the equation shifts, and they begin to learn from their children.

Do you learn from your children? I do. This is possible only if you have built trust in the relationship, and you are humble enough to focus and listen to what your children are saying.

If you teach your children in a loving way, sooner, or later they will teach you back. Sometimes they will critique you on the same behaviour you tried to correct in them.

If you actively pursue this, you can put them in command to help you to change your habits.

You will be surprised at how persistent and caring they can be to correct you. This approach has an added advantage-Your children will learn quicker as they teach and monitor you.

It is always a two-way street.

Try this out. You will be surprised how quickly and deeply the bonds between you and your children will grow.

How to feel happy to the core of your being?

When was the last time you felt really good inside? There are different forms of happiness. One of the best ways of gaining happiness is trying to make others feel cared for.
Here are a few tips:

• Do something for others that you have never done for them.
• Help a friend financially when he asks you for help, even though you know the money may never come back.
• Go to an old age home and lend an ear to an elderly person.
• Pray for a stranger.
• Spend time with your child, even if you have a lot of things to do.
• Give the most unexpected help to your spouse.
• Give a gift just for the sake of giving.
• Throw a party and call your friends just for the reason of being with them.
• Find a place of solitude and reflect all the up and down of your life. Express a sign of gratitude that all your fears never materialized, and you are fine even as you think.

There are many times we need to manufacture happiness for us. These are a few ways to do so. If you have more ideas, please do contribute.

What can you learn from the film Karate kid?

I found the film very captivating. There are many scenes in the film that rang a chord in my heart, having lived far away, from my own country, India, in the United States and in Switzerland, I can well understand the struggles, the 12 year old kid Dre Parker undergoes in the ancient land of China.
Here are a few lessons you can learn from the film:

• All cultures other than your culture will seem to jar when you first encounter them.
• You may strike a chord of friendship immediately with a few, but you may also encounter people who are rude to you.
• If you attempt to speak their language it will cut ice faster.
• You cannot push your loved ones to like the culture, they have to strike their equation on their own.
• You may find help from strange places and people you may not even imagine.
• It takes time to get used to a culture.
• Never paint a culture bad based on few individual behaviours. There are people who behave badly in your culture too.
• Every culture has deep mysteries and wisdom from which you can learn and broaden your horizon.
• A burning, positive goal within the context of the new culture can change your perspective completely.
• Search for things you can take into your own culture. The more you take, the better chances you will have to give them from your culture.
• Perfect practice makes you flawless.
• In a competition, winning is not everything.
• Discipline comes before mastery.
• Honesty and integrity will ultimately triumph.
• Winning over your fear of losing is more important than winning itself.
• Every culture is good, you have a great opportunity to learn and grow.

These are a few learning points from the film. If you have observed more, please do contribute.

As I wrote this, I have assumed  that you have seen the movie, The Karate Kid. (2010).http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1155076/plotsummary

How to cope with people when they change?

You may have noticed this, time and again. People change! People change without informing you that they have changed a new leaf. 

Many a times you may have not even noticed that they have changed until you get hurt by what they say or do.

What do you do in such circumstances?

Here are a few tips to make your life easier:

Forgive them! You need to do this more for yourself than anyone else.

Stop immediately attributing their behavior to their personal character. Most of the time the behavior change could be due to situation or circumstances.

If you feel that the person is important, and you want to maintain your relationship with him or her, critique, openly and honestly.

Critique in a manner that you attack the person’s behavior and not the person itself.

Make the person aware that you were hurt by his or her behavior.

If the person repeats his or her behavior, get into critiquing again.

At some point tell the person, if the behavior is continuing, that it is becoming a relationship issue and would need evaluation, whether the relationship should continue or not.

Cut the relationship if the person is not willing to correct himself or herself. You could decide whether the relationship is cut, for the time being, or forever.

While you are attempting to do these remedial measures, you also need to develop certain criteria for behavior classification-The ones you are prepared to pardon and stay in the game to continue the relationship and the ones you are prepared  to pardon but discontinue the relationship.

Examples where you may want to discontinue the relationships are:

·         Cheating

·         Robbing

·         Physical abuse

·         Sexual abuse

·         Demeaning and constant harassment

·         Treating you like a thing and not as a human

 The  list could be longer for you or shorter. You have to decide. Developing such criteria can save you a lot of pain.

A thumb rule to remember always is to forgive, no matter what, but never forget.

How to get brilliant ideas?

Do you know that there is a vast potential of ideas in you that never surface and see the day? Whether you realize it or not, there is a vast treasure house of ideas within you which has been supressed all these days, months, years, or even a lifetime.


Why do these ideas remain hidden? What suppresses them? How do they get supressed are the key questions you need to ask yourself?

Let me give you the reasons why they do not surface, eventhough you need them:

• Constantly restless mind


• Always focusing on the external world


• Always being in company of people


• Television


• Video games


• Seeking constant stimulation from outside


• Always speaking and rarely remaining silent


• A limiting belief that you are not an ideas person

These are few of the reasons why those wonderful ideas within you rarely see the day.

Here are some concrete steps to surface them:

• Choose a specific area where you want ideas


• Dwell on it for a few days


• Start a new habit of spending atleast an hour alone


• Put away all the external stimuli-go to a queit place


• Choose a specific time for thei get away


• Practice quieting your mind-learn to meditate and pray deeply


• Relax and enjoy the peace


• Focus on the peace day in day out


• As you listen and go deep and let go, ideas will begin to surface on its own

You will need to practice this routine every day and be patient. Over a period of time, you will suddenly start getting a flood of ideas.

Try this out! It works like magic! It is magic

How to apply your mind and stay out of trouble?

I have observed this, time and again, people just don't apply their minds to solve their problems. Even if they do apply thier minds, they do not go all the way to generate sufficient options. The end result is they choose a suboptimal option that gives them mediocre results.

How do you ensure that you always get the best of the solutions for yourself? The secret magic key is to apply your mind.

Here are a few tips:

1. Generate atleast five options before you choose the final solution
2. Revisit the solution after an appropriate period of time.
3. Discard solutions that are not working; Go back to the drawing board often
4. Discuss with your spouse or friend to get new perspectives
5. Surf the net atleast once to get new ideas
6. Be alert to the impact of the solution on your life
7. Write a journal about your experience of implementing a chosen solution

These  are few tips to get you started; Come up with your own

Just start it!

Everyone of us have the tendency to procrastinate fun things we want to do.


I have recently started doing things as quickly as possible and as near in time to the thought of doing that particular thing as possible. 

The results are amazing! I am doing much more and enjoying life much more. No more postponement, just start it and the momentum will carry you through

What do you think? Try it out!

What goes around comes around!

Recently I witnessed a person getting pay back for what he did some time back. It took about a year for the fruits to bear; However, it finally did.

Think carefully what you do to others! Your deeds have a peculiar in built ability to bring the hens home to roost!

Even though evildoers will seem to succeed and have lucky breaks, their deeds will eventually catch up with them in a time called the pay back time.

What do you think?

How to overcome immobilization by fear?

Many a times we are immobilized by fear. We shun an activity or a task as we imagine all kinds of consequences of performing it.


This immobilization may persist for years. You may have even attempted the task but given up half way. Here is a tip that may help you.


Handover the responsibility for making you perform the task to a person whom you trust. 


Make that person take charge of you and the task. Ask the person to be ruthless and counteract all your arguments for not performing the task.


Go ahead and perform it under the chosen person's supervision! You will be surprised! 


The task will get done and you also may realize how easy it was.


Let me know after your success. Share your success here!

How to stay focused if you are too creative?

Creative people get lots of ideas. Some of them are good and many of them need reworking. The problem for creative people is to stay focused. They quickly get bored with their own ideas.


Here are few tips to stay focused:

1. Scan through your ideas
2. Select just one idea to work on
3. Develop action steps to achieve that idea
4. Determine at what stage of completion of the action steps you will start embarking on a new idea
5. Implement those action steps
6. Start o a new idea only after reaching an agreed upon progress of the first chosen idea
7. Let all the new ideas incubate in an idea bank

You will be able to accomplish much more if you stay focused.

What do you think?

Super Consultant-my new comic

How does your cell phone reveal a lot about you?

The way you use your cell phone will tell you a lot about yourself.
Here are hints that you are careless or downright foolish:

1. Do you take a call while you are talking with someone?
2. Do you talk over the cell phone while driving?
3. Do you text message while driving?
4. Do you check your email while talking to someone over the cell phone?
5. Do you stop a presentation and take a call?
6. Do you visit someone and start talking over the cell phone with another?
7. Do you forget to return a call?
8. Do you call someone up and start speaking without checking whether he or she is free to talk to you?
9. Do you take a call in a flight when you are not supposed to, despite the warning of the air hostess?
10. Do you forget to keep your cell phone on a silent mode in a meeting?
11. Do you forget to turn off the silent mode of your cell phone and miss calls?
12. Do you keep the cell phone in some corner of your house on a holiday and not hear it ring, thus missing calls?

These are some of the key signals that you could be a careless person.

Correct these mistakes for your own good.

Super Consultant-my new comic

Super Consultant-my new comic

Do you get distracted easily?

Has this happened to you? You start your day with full enthusiasm and as the day goes by you suddenly find yourself wasting the day on some trivial or useless pursuit. You recognize this state you are in, but you don't stop or are unable to stop.
Why does this happen, often, to you? If you have a chronic problem, days go by and weeks go by without accomplishing much.
Here are some of the major reasons you get distracted, again and again:

• No vision of the future
• No clear goals set
• Pleasure centered approach to life
• Harbor a misnomer that self-discipline is bad
• Want to escape from reality
• A strong habit of wasting time
• No demands placed on you by your organization
• No demands placed on you by your family
• A sense of habitual indifference
• A belief that you are very smart and intelligent and can get to the tasks and finish them easily
• Overconfidence
• Settled for "less" in life

It is time to pull up your socks and get going.

Here are a few tips to break loose:

1. Stop the source of your distraction-turn off the T.V, disconnect from the internet---
2. Spend time to rethink your life
3. Set long term exciting goals
4. Talk to your spouse
5. Take your friend's help
6. Read an inspiring book
7. Get organized and in control
8. Limit your pleasurable activities to a predetermined duration and time
9. Start small and conquer
10. Set family goals together
11. Celebrate small wins when you get back in control
12. Set up some productive routines-exercise, meditation, reading---
13. Substitute time wasting activities with new important activities
14. Review the program you have set for your self every week
15. Make course corrections based on the review

All the best! Reclaim your life using the tips given above.

Making life worthwhile-my new inspirational comic poster

Super Consultant-my new comic

What are the warning signs that you are chronically out of control?

It is easy to be habitually out of control and not even be aware of that state. Over a period of time, being out of control becomes a way of life. 
You get used to the stress. You get used to missing deadlines. You get used to disappointing people. 


Over a period of time this way of life becomes hard wired in to your brain.
You may, well, note these warning signs:

1. You have too many things to do and you do not know where to begin
2. You  are constantly missing appointments
3. People keep calling you up to remind things you promised to deliver to them
4. Your spouse has given up on you
5. Your children do not trust you anymore
6. You have come to the point of not caring about the direction your life is taking
7. You are aware of several problems-obesity, finance out of control, debts, eating junk food, reading trashy novels, smoking, drinking, forgetting birthdays----and you are doing nothing about them
8. Every small setback gives you the power to procrastinate
9. You indulge excess in some mindless activity such as internet surfing, video games, chatting, Facebook, watching the same movie again and again---
10. You live moment to moment with no planning for future
11. You set elaborate plans and never follow them
12. Your house is a junk yard
13. You have low energy even in the morning
14. You overeat 
15. You have no friends or your friends have abandoned you
16. You are on the verge of losing your job
17. Your skill sets are all redundant
18. You have sunken eyes because of lack of sleep
19. Your libido is low
20. You constantly fear that things will go wrong because you know deep inside you that you are not well prepared
21. You dream of some unrealistic fantasy where you picture yourself very rich and powerful
22. You do nothing to realize your dreams
23. You have lost touch with your family
24. Your children are aping you
25. You know deep inside you need to change but you feel helpless

If you have several of these signs then what you need to realize is that you have hit the bottom. 


The good news is that the only direction you can move is upwards; Another good news is that you have the choice-either to remain at the bottom or to move upwards.

The journey is tough but the sooner you begin the better it will be for you.